People say crying is one of the best ways to release all those negative emotions. Well, I guess I really need to cry then. I remember when I was younger, a lady, I think she was a relative, told me "stop crying, the only time you should cry is in times of happiness". From then on I tried to stop being such a cry baby about everything. I haven't cried since my grandfather died in the 7th grade. I use to love him to death. At his funeral my aunt terry said "don't waste your tears on him, he is in a better place." I told myself from then on, I will not ever cry again. Well now I'm a junior in college and I've cried once since then. I don't remember what it feels like though. I think a reason why I do not cry anymore is because, I don't have anybody to cry to. I can truthfully say there is not one person on earth, that I can trust my weakness moment with. I no friend no family member. There is a person who I want to be the one I can trust all of me into. But I feel like I have lost her. I had a pop up quiz and failed. Now idk if I will still get a passing grade. I feel like, she got pushed to the edge, and said fuck it. When I'm at the edge sign 6 feet by creed talking bout it ain't so far down. Know that once I take that step off I'm dead. The real question is do I wanna die. Do I want to continue living the rest of my life, tearless. Or do I want to go get fixed, and be able to cry once more. I know my purpose, I just need a reason
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